Missions, Europe, Scotland won this weekend. They won this weekend on probably one of my favorite outdoor leadership trips. They won, because I realized they have the potential of bringing outdoors in. Colorado will never be Europe. I love colorado, I love the mountains. But well there is something greater out there. There is the dream that when I found it changed my life forever. The place that highlights everything that makes me.. me. The journey I feel like I was made to go on. If this isn't what calling feels like, then I don't know what would

"Jesus was called a friend of sinners, relentlessy pursuing the downtrodden. What an irony that today his followers are seen in the opposite light! How can people love God whom they can't see, if those of us who claim to represent him don't respond to outsiders with his love?"
- unchristian

I'm reading for Global Engagement right now. and the more I read the more I realize that it is restoring my hope back to God, something I never knew I lost.
But I saw the suffering and I think somewhere in my subconscious I wondered where were you God? Where were you during the Rwandan Genocide? Are you with the children with swollen bellies? Why don't you stop it? Why have you given me so much, when others have so little?
I knew God was good, I knew he loved me, but I forgot God was just, I forgot that God wants to show his love to the whole world through his people, it started to feel like a self struggle I made up myself.
I forgot that God tells us that he is in the places on earth where the darkness reigns. And I forgot that the reason I feel called to missions is because God is calling me to be his hands and his feet in these areas. In the areas of Scotland where rates of SAD and depression are so high that elementary schools have posters about depression, God has called me to help bring his joy. For the first time in a long time, I feel on fire for what God wants me to do in the future. I feel purpose; I feel mission. All from a book on social justice. Glenn Beck I never liked you much anyway, but by making social justice a curse word you have done the the church great harm.

I feel weird admitting this, because it's not something a 23 year old almost 24 girl is supposed to feel.
It's also scary because I don't want to be this way my whole life. because I want to be a mom, it's honestly my dream career. The only one I've wanted to do since I was 3.

but God's been teaching me the pleasures of singleness lately, and he's been giving me this huge desire to help other girls on this journey. Paul tried to tell us that it's better to be single, and while I don't believe it's an all accomplishing verse. The man has a point. I know for this next stage of my life, my single college graduate stage its a very very very good thing I'm single. I'm a free bird, I can literally go and do whatever I can go and do with the resources I have available to me. I don't have to worry about how it will effect a boyfriend, I don't have have to hope and pray that a husband would be feeling the same call (though that is a wonderful way of accountability). I can devote everything within me

I'm kind of a free spirit you might say, something flipped in my brain sometime between the end of high school and the beginning of CCU and I really don't mind thinking differently then those around me. It's been the distinguishing feature of my college career actually. as I've said before most of time in class is spent feeling like the most liberal or the most conservative person there. I lean towards Calvinism at a school where it's pretty unheard of. But the thing is after awhile thinking for yourself and forming your own opinions gets a little lonely. I start to wonder sometime if there is anyone that thinks like me in the state of Colorado. Days like last year when Sarah Palin came to town were especially hard.
But then there are other days, days that the other people who think for themselves talk up in class. They vent their frustration, and say what the bible tells them even if it isn't the popular opinion. These days my soul breathes a sigh of relief, and I get a better picture of what it means to be the body of Christ. Because my automatic reaction isn't being defensive, because it isn't the same old, same old. I become inspired to grow closer to God and to make a difference in the world. I learn.
Thank you God for today.

God has been teaching me a lot lately about what it means to live for him, and stand up for truth in this world (read my earlier post from last year about shorter which explains in more detail). But the thing he keeps on reminding me, is that we can't pick and choose what commands we want to follow. We must follow the law, but we also must love, we must reach out to those in need, we must live simply, we must be Jesus' hands and feet in this broken and hurting world. We must love God with all whole hearts, and our neighbor as our self. When we do this everything else falls in place.
We don't sin as a way to follow God, but when we devote everything in our live in our being to God obedience, love is a result is a lesson God keeps on teaching me

a Ugandan friend passed away today, due to a motorcycle accident. Please keep everyone that knew him in your prayers.